Dance in the Wind

I need to keep moving,
to see the sky up close,
to dance in the wind
whirling about me.

The sea is eggshell green today
and I hesitate
but know there’s no more time
for turning back.

This desperate hold knows me best,
not the shallow friends
who flinch
at the first sign of sadness or madness.

I trust no one now, just my heart
and the broken wings
with dirty brown flecks
burned from the last time I tried.

There’s no turning back,
I need to see the sky up close,
to touch the clouds,
to hold on to the dream.

And in the last moments
I remember every song and sunset,
every last feeling that came close to happy
and I reason with myself,

“Don’t get distracted now,
keep sight of what you want;
their empty words distract you for a while
but soon they stilt and age and wear you down

and every word drags on
until you can’t bear it anymore
and you have way too many regrets
and who says you have to stay?”.

I feel the cold in my bones,
behind my eyes where the light has gone
and down in the pumping blood of my heart
and I wish it wasn’t such a hard thing to leave.